Exploring Our Children’s Potentials

We have one iPad in our family.

A rather old one (iPad 2), but I use it ALL THE TIME whenever I have shoots and interviews.

Wilson uses it too sometimes.

And, Anya and Vai would use it every now and then to play their downloaded games.
(No, our 3yo Brie does not play with any electronic gadgets)

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Sometime back we browsed around for a new iPad case, as our existing one was getting too old and flimsy.

And this is what we mainly look out for when choosing a case for our iPad : 

> Good fit.

It’s annoying if the case doesn’t not fit properly and the front or back cameras get ‘covered’ by the case.

> A case that covers my iPad screen

With kids around, we do not want to risk scratching or cracking our iPad screen (from a fall or any other unintentional ‘accidents’)

> Canvas case 

Again, with kids around, we must have something that’s on the ‘tough side’.

> Nice look

Of course Wilson and I must LIKE the colour and look of the case =)

(And oh, of course the price needs to be acceptable too! )

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Now. Say HELLO to our new iPad case by SNUGG! =D

> Good fit?

Yes.

> A case that covers my iPad screen?

Yes, and I personally like how there’s no ‘strap’ to hold the cover. There are magnets to keep the cover in a ‘closed position’.

> Canvas case? 

Yep.

> Nice look?

We like the color and pattern on this case (compared to having a plain one-coloured case).

Other extra features worth mentioning? 

> I like the hand strap!

Especially useful when I need to firmly hold my iPad during shoots.

> I like the extra pockets for me to keep my little notes.

So, there you go! My SNUGG iPad case! =D

We like! =D

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What factors do you pay more attention to when looking for a case for your gadget?

[Common sights along the street of Jakarta, when Jakarta is flooded]

If you live in Singapore, Australia or in the US, most likely you’re used to having … clean water.

Unfortunately, clean water for the family can be hard to find if you live in Indonesia.

Even for many MANY people in Jakarta, access to clean water can be tough (I see this everyday here in this city!)

What more if you live in small villages!

One of the things that saddens me is the high rate of  death in children below the age of five here in this country.

Like, the province of East Nusa Tenggara (Nusa Tenggara Timur), … I just found out that it has one of the highest rate of death in children below five, compared to other provinces in Indonesia!

ie. About 58 in 1000 children below five, die because of … diarrhea!

Yes, death by diarrhea in the 21st century! =(

Brie just turned three years old two weeks ago, and I truly can’t imagine if she can’t live till the age of five simply because of poor hygiene practice in my family or tough access to clean water!

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Anyway.

I’d like to share with you two things today:

First, it’s this article (click HERE) featured in the Jakarta Globe.

You’ll get a better understanding of how life is like in East Nusa Tenggara from the article.

Second, I’d like to share this video with you.

It’s worth watching and I thought it’ll be great if our kids can watch it too!

Hmm, just in case you’re wondering why, it is so that :

> They too are aware of what’s going on in other parts of the world – something for them to pray for
> They can see how many things they have today at home may not even be available in those places
> They are reminded to look after their own hygiene everyday too.

If you’d like to support the cause initiated by Lifebuoy, you can read more about it here:

> Lifebuoy Facebook
> Lifebuoy Youtube
> Lifebuoy Twitter
> Lifebuoy Website

[This post is by Lifebuoy, but all thoughts are my own]

I don’t know about you, but we have quite a bit of ‘brown paper’ at home.

You know, the type you’d use to cover the kids’ school books with!

So anyway, the other day, I thought Brie and I should make use of it!

What we did:

– I cut some of it into long strips.

– We twirled each one of them.

– I glued the twirled brown paper onto a piece of drawing paper.

– Brie drew ‘fruits’ and ‘flowers’ on the tree using her crayons

And that’s about it really!

Turned out quite good, I thought =D

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Hmm, let’s see, how else can I make use of our brown paper? Ideas, anyone?

Some two weeks ago, Anya had another important milestone.

Together with her friends at Jakarta Oratoria Society Children Choir (JOSCC), they all performed at Aula Simfonia Jakarta, Indonesia’s one and only concert hall!

[Photo from www.aulasimfoniajakarta.com]

Btw, if you haven’t been there, do catch a concert there! Highly recommended! Excellent acoustic, and rated as one of the best in the world, according to international performers’ own reviews! Check out their schedule of events from their website. Click HERE!)

[One of the final rehearsals inside the concert hall]

The experience was not just new to Anya, it was a new (and fun!) one for me too!

Because, … I joined the backstage team, and did some make-up on the performing characters! =)

This me and Rini, who did the make up and hair on ‘Elijah’, who in real life is a very young man =)

And here’re my two ‘creations’! *evil laugh*

Transforming two teenagers into … the evil King Ahab and Queen Jezebel!

I had so much fun doing their face =)

Of course, here’s Anya, who sang in the children choir AND played the handbell earlier.

(Oh btw, all tickets were sold out that day! Yay!)

And oh, before I forget, here they are : the kind but silly King Levi and all-smiles Princess Brie! Self-appointed rulers! =D

Anyway.

It was a very tiring week for all.

But you know what?

It’s all worth it.

And I thank God that our little family can be part of this event.

Looking forward to the next one!

If you are a parent, the topic of tuitions and extra-curricular activities usually come up quite regularly.

Do you send your kids to tuitions?

If yes, which ones?

Why do you choose to send your kids to those?

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The other day I had such a conversation with a friend =)

Do Anya and Vai have any tuitions? 

Yep, they do.

Anya has Mandarin and Piano.
(At school, she’s in the Painting and Maths Club)

Vai has Mandarin and Tennis.
(At school, he’s in the Basketball Club and Painting class)

They both have swimming lessons since they first arrived in Jakarta 2 years ago, but next week will be their last.

So, from then onwards, they’ll have their weekly swim all on their own, doing laps, since they’ve mastered at least 2 swimming styles so far (and we’re not going ‘competitive’ with swimming anyway).

A friend I know sends her child to attend ‘Abacus’ tuition, and as the result of this tuition, he thinks faster and it helps with his learning of other subjects. What do you think about this?

There will always be benefits / good reasons for attending any class or tuition. That’s the reason why parents send their kids to tuition A, B and C.

To put it simply, I personally believe if the child is not over-scheduled (ie. So many extra-curricular activities / tuitions everyday that the child is almost always ‘occupied’ and busy), and if financially it is possible to send the child to a particular tuition / class, then … I think, why not?

 I do NOT wish for my children to be so busy and occupied, yet their hearts, their souls, are … empty.   For our family’s case, we choose to keep our children’s weekends as free as possible from tuitions, so they can play, relax and spend time with the family.

I know many parents today believe children are like sponges, they’re smart, so they should not be ‘idle’, doing ‘nothing’, because it’ll be such a waste of time. Their ‘brain’ needs to be exercised and developed. And this often means, they need to go to different tuitions and lessons (on top of their regular school hours).

And, on top of such activities, these little ones also are allowed to have many hours on the computer / electronic devices, though at home.

First of all, I agree, our children’s potential is amazing. That’s how amazingly created they are.

At the same time however, I too personally believe, filling up a child’s world with academics and extra-curricular activities, day in and day out, will consequently take away precious time and opportunities needed to pick up ‘skills’ like :

… sharing with siblings
… caring and looking out after another family member
… patience
… listening to what others need to say
… taking the time to self-introspect and ask for forgiveness
… forgiving others
… compassion
… respecting others and self
… helping out at home and sharing parents’ housework loads

Well, I believe, all this can only be gained through EXPERIENCE.

I mean, while academics and knowledge can be learned from teachers / books / enrichment centers / coaches, the kind of ‘skills’ above CANNOT.

Our children’s potential is amazing. That’s how amazingly created they are.It is only when our children have the TIME to spend at home, listening to what we can teach / share with them, learning from each other, and simply interacting WITH the family and friends, that they can learn all the above, and more.

In short, I simply do NOT wish for my children to be so busy and occupied (becoming so ‘able’ and ‘well-rounded’?), yet their hearts, their souls, are … empty.

But you know what?

Here’s one reality that we often dislike.

Spending more time with the family automatically means we’ll see and hear more bickering, arguments and cries.

(because naturally, when we interact more, there’s a higher chance of frictions and disagreements,  yes?)

But that’s what ALL children need, isn’t it?

And, as much as I dread such ‘noises’, I tell myself (again and again and again) that THIS IS PART AND PARCEL OF BEING A PARENT.

It’s part of growing up as a family.

ie. Learning to cope with differences and the existence of others  (yes, even when they seem to be annoying!)

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As what I’ve said before, I hope and pray that my children are not ‘full in the head but empty in the hearts’.

And I believe, as challenging as it is, one way to achieve this is to let the children simply spend time with each other – even spend some ‘free time’ with oneself – and not too much ‘busy-ness’, engagements with electronic media, and ‘tuitions’.

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Phew. Not easy.

But I guess, that’s parenting.

And it’s a struggle everyday.

May God help us and shower us with HIS wisdom.

WHOAAAA!!

Look who’s THREE!

Our littlest Brie is growing up too fast!

Sigh. Can’t believe the littlest in the family is not that little anymore!

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Ah anyway. We all love you, Brie!

I must say, this is probably one of the simplest activities for toddlers, that involves watercolour.

Crayon PLUS watercolour PLUS straw!

I drew stars on the drawing paper using a crayon
(so you can still see the drawing, even after you brush watercolour over the crayon lines)

I let Brie paint on the paper, and try to colour the star outlines as best as she can, on her own.

And.

I dripped some watercolour on the paper.

Using a straw, she blew the blobs away.

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And this is what you get.

Pretty pretty, I thought =)

Dear parents,

I have this heavy burden in my heart, and I feel I should write about it and share it with you.

It’s about OUR children, and the kinds of games created and made available to them, today.

Have you heard of games like ‘GTA’ (short for ‘Grand Theft Auto’) more and more boys play these days?

It’s a game where players get to fantasise about being a ‘top notch criminal’ – stealing cars, killing the cops, running down pedestrians, etc.

games out there meant for young girls, where they get to fantasise about having boyfriends, flirting, dressing up and going out for datesOr, have you heard about the oh-so-many games out there meant for young girls, where they get to fantasise about having boyfriends, flirting, dressing up and going out for dates, kissing and doing ‘more activities’ with their so-called virtual boyfriends?

Are we aware of the kinds of games OUR children play?

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Also, do our children have ‘free access’ to everything online? (Through their smartphones, computers, or tablets)

Do our children ‘freely’ download games online?

Sigh.

Unfortunately, this is the reality: we live in the day and age where we often are not aware of the danger of the ‘online world’. Often, because it’s simply not ‘physical’.

I mean, many parents would NOT let their children walk all alone in a deserted park at night for fear of rapists, criminals, robbers and all sorts of weird people harming their children.

More and more children are increasingly ‘de-sensitised’ towards violence, crime, negative / dangerous behavoursBut these very same parents might ALLOW their children enter the online world freely, without any supervision or care. In the comfort of the children’s home or bedroom, these children may – highly possibly – be exposed to obscenity, vulgarity, violence, pedophiles, criminals (acting as harmless young children themselves), etc.

This. Is. Such. A. Scary. Reality.

More and more children are increasingly exposed and  ‘de-sensitised’ towards violence, crime, negative / dangerous behavours, to name a few.

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So what am I trying to urge and encourage my fellow parents to do?

1) Let’s start building a stronger bond and trust, between ourselves and our children.

This is so so sooo crucial, much more crucial than the time when ‘WE’ grew up.

Why?

Because at the time when WE grew up, electronic media was not as widely available to children as it is today. And, the online world at the time has not become as varied (read : ‘negative for children in more ways’) as today too.

Our children MUST be able to trust that we indeed love themOur children MUST be able to trust that we indeed love them, and openly communicate and share with us about ‘their world’. And if our communication and relationship with our children is good, when we ask them to NOT play a particular game (or two or three), they’d *hopefully* listen because they trust it is for their best interest.

Now.

It gets tougher when our children enter their teenage years, yes?

Well, all parents know how this IS a possible reality (May God help us!).

But I genuinely believe a loving and open communication with teenagers IS still possible, IF the parents have spent time and effort – sacrifices, tears and prayers –  in building a loving and strong relationship with their children, since they’re very young.

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2) We should never be ‘naive’ and unaware of what’s going on in our children’s world, online and offline.

Of course it doesn’t mean that we must ‘know all game developments’, nor become ‘intrusive’ parents, who ‘probe’ into our children’s lives like uncaring detectives.

it doesn’t mean that we become ‘intrusive’ parents, who ‘probe’ into our children’s lives like uncaring detectivesI guess, one thing that we can surely try to do is develop a routine, a habit, based on trust and love, where the children are encouraged to always openly share their days, their friends, the happenings, everyday (And as they grow older, we too share with them our daily lives and struggles, etc)

And, before each download or purchase of games, we parents need to find out more about the games too.

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3) Share with the children the potential danger of some online and offline games.

I strongly believe parents today need to educate and equip their children to ‘discern’ what’s right and what’s wrong, what’s healthy and what’s not.

eventually, they do need to discern and make the ‘right’ choices in their livesBecause, we can never be with them all the time.

As they grow up, they’ll be exposed to all sorts of temptations, challenges, tough choices.

And eventually, they do need to discern and make the ‘right’ choices in their lives.

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4) Control the amount of ‘game time’ (exposure) our children get

How much game time is allowed by you?

Hours each day?

Do our children have their own smartphones / computers in their rooms / laptops with free internet access? *simply too dangerous, btw*

Games are undeniably addictive.Games are undeniably addictive.

And the impact will be worse with children if game time is not monitored (eg. Allocation of study/reading time is less, shorter concentration level at school, negative impact on their eyesights, etc).

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Sigh. Growing up is so much harder these days.

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And gee, this is such a looooong post!

(And I haven’t even written everything that I wish I could write about!)

But.

My main thoughts are poured out here.

And I hope and pray that this post is read by as many parents as possible.

Please do share it, if you feel this is a topic that other parents need to pay more attention to as well.

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Growing up is so much harder these days.Parents,

We all know it.

Parenting is SO not easy.

Which is why I pray hard for my children.

(for their faith, their safety, their well-being, and their everything, and for myself, my daily sanity, strength from above, and for everything else too!)

Besides, I too need God’s help and wisdom everyday.

For I am too far from perfect or capable to be a parent.

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May God have mercy on our children and every one of us.