Exploring Our Children’s Potentials

Amidst our busy and mad day to day activities, it may often be difficult to see how family is really God’s gift to us.

Many may even see their family or children as a ‘burden’ that takes away their ‘freedom’.

I don’t know how you feel about your family, … all I know is, … regardless of how WE feel, the fact still stands, … family IS God’s gift to us.

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How do YOU feel about your family?

I believe ‘how we feel’ towards something also depends on our ‘mindset’ or worldview towards it.

Eg. If we see our marriage as a ‘trap’, we naturally will feel easily irritated by the actions of our spouse.

On the other hand, if we see children as treasures temporarily entrusted into our hands, then we can survive ‘tough parenting days’ better, and we will raise our children as best as we can, while they’re still with us.

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Food for thought?

Hello! Ah, we have been so busy everyday and I feel so guilty for not updating my blog as often as I wish. 

(I am active on Facebook, btw. You are most welcome to add me there =)

Anyway.

I want to share with you Vai’s little ‘milestone’ today.

You see, he has recently turned 10yo and he’s been complaining about his eyes and how they ‘feel uncomfortable’ when he’s reading small texts.

Frankly, we didn’t immediately ‘respond’ to his complaints because when we took him to different optometrists, they all said that kids below 12yo will still experience ‘changes’ in their eyes. And, that Vai has a little ‘plus’ on one of his eye.

Eventually though, we decided that he’d need a pair of glasses to help him read better, especially when he’s at school.

(Right now, I’m still adjusting to his ‘new look’ =)
 
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Vai has a plus 0.75 on one eye and a minus 0.25 on the other (and a bit of astig, too).

Kind of unusual for a 10yo to have such a condition, I thought. But then again, a friend of ours, an eye doctor, said that it’s apparently not that uncommon.

She shared these tips with me:

– Do not spend too much time on gadgets / smartphones

– Spending too much time looking at screens, at a close distance, is what makes the eyes go ‘minus’

– Kids should not spend more than 14 hours a week on gadgets
 
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You see, Vai generally does not spend more than 1.5 hours of gadget time every week.

So perhaps, it’s just hereditary? (my parents and sisters all wear glasses)

I don’t know.

Anyway, I’m just curious, … do you have a child with similar eye condition, too?

By Anya: 12 Years, 6 Months

Are you a parent? A teacher? An educator?

A few things have happened in the past weeks, and it got me thinking about what we truly hope to see in our children.
 
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Do we prefer to have quiet kids who sweetly sit in our classes?

Do we detest children who tend to speak their mind, opinionated?

I’m not a big fan of Michael Jackson (though I feel he’s a great artist and performer), but when I LOVED watching this clip, or should I say, I loved watching these talented kids, … individuals who are different in their own way.

 
A few things that came to mind after I watched the clip:

The drummer may find it hard to keep still in class.

The singer may not do well in science (despite studying for it).

The guitarist may not like maths.

The violinist may not be a confident speaker.

The tap dancers may have problems in staying focused in their studies.
 
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Is it possible that perhaps we adults are the ones who fail to see and fail to seek the POTENTIALS and talents that God has given to them?
Whatever it is, I feel sometimes we parents (and teachers/educators) tend to focus on what our children are NOT good at.

We dislike (and regularly discipline) children who are ‘different than the rest’, children who are more ‘difficult’, children who ‘disobey’.

Don’t get me wrong, I believe in authority and order. I believe children need to learn what is right and wrong, what is good and bad manners, etc. Since young.

What I hope to say is, is it possible that perhaps we adults are the ones who fail to see and fail to seek the POTENTIALS and talents that God has given to them?

For example, instead of always expecting children to be obedient and interested (in how we teach in class), have we thought that perhaps the reason some children not interested / chat / not paying attention is because:

– they have mastered the materials (faster than the others)

– they have personal problems at home

– they see us as only interested in their grades and not in them as a ‘person’

– we (how we speak, how we teach, how we live) fail to inspire and challenge their curious minds

– we expect one style / method of teaching or parenting to ‘work’ for ALL children

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I see myself as a parent and a teacher, and I very well know how difficult it is to do the ‘job’.

I mean, it can be so mentally draining to teach a child. It’s even harder to handle more than one!

I’m just sharing my personal reflection.

As the adult, have we reflected upon our teaching or parenting style? Perhaps the fault is more on OUR side rather than on THEIR side.

AS the adult, we need to see that those children whom we see as rebellious, difficult, tough and hopeless, … perhaps there are BIG talents and potentials they have yet to discover.

Have we reflected upon our teaching or parenting style? Perhaps the fault is more on OUR side rather than on THEIR sideThe road is still long for us, and for them.

But let us be someone who strive to inspire our children, our students.

Because they’re the ones God has entrusted into our care.

*Reminder to self*

May God help us.

If you happen to be in Central Sulawesi, you may want to check out this beach!

It’s called ‘Pantai Tanjung Karang’ (read: Tanjung Karang beach)
 

It’s only some 45km away from Palu, the capital city of Central Sulawesi.

Drive towards Donggala, and look for ‘Prince John Diving Resort’.

Clear water. Awesome view of the surrounding mountains.
 

We didn’t have much time to spend at the beach, so we rented our flippers, life jackets and mask, and simply plunged into the waters!

How can we miss the experience!
 

Our rented boat didn’t go towards the middle of the sea. We went towards the right of the beach, and … even there, the colourful fishes and creatures we saw down under were already sooo nice! I can’t imagine how much more beautiful the world below would be if we went even deeper!

So glad I brought along my shorts and spare clothes!
 

[Emm … excuse us! We just had to do this couple jump shot! Haha. Photo was taken by my father in law =)]
 

Anyway, again I really feel the local government should do more for local places like this.

I mean, when we searched for the place, we had to ask around. There were no clear signages.

And when we found it, the ‘carpark area’ looked more like a slum. Seriously, I didn’t expect to see such a beautiful beach ‘behind’ the rundown fences.
 

If MORE attention could be given to develop, maintain and regulate places like this, I’m sure more would come and visit, and the locals would benefit from it, too.

(Note: When we visit any place of interest, let’s do our part and NOT litter anywhere, even if the place is already dirty)

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INFO:
– Snorkeling equipments (mask and snorkel / a pair of flippers / life jacket): Rp15,000 each
– Boat rent (one hour) : Rp150,000
– There are toilets and washing areas by the beach
– They have fresh coconuts there too.

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Anyway.

I look forward to exploring more of our beautiful Indonesia!

So much to see and experience!

I know it’s rare.

Our 5yo Brie still knows her 91yo great grandmother and 73yo grandmother.

Four generation is hard to find these days.

I hope our children realise how precious it is to be part of such a big family.

Activity idea for preschoolers.

All you need is:

– Used cardboards

– Crayons

– Glue

Have fun! 🙂

 
Have you ever imagined how things will be like (or how we hope things will be) some 10, 15, 20 years down the road?

What kind of a person will your child be?

Encourage communication. Ask, listen and don’t easily comment negatively What kind of work ethics you want him to have?

In what ways will she view life, and herself?

What kind of relationships with others do you wish she has?

What kind of parent-child communication will you have with all your children?

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I took a book off my shelf last night, and re-read Dr. Kevin Leman’s book, titled ‘Have a new kid by Friday’.

I read it a long time ago, but I was inspired once again.

Here are some thoughts I hope to share with you today.

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Lauren is 23, has been working for 3 months, and is always late for work. Her boss notices how she is very defensive whenever anyone gives some feedback, even constructive ones.

Johnny is 30yo, and has been married for a year. He hardly offers help and watches TV as soon as he gets home from work. They have no helper and he expects his wife, who also has a fulltime job, to prepare their meals and does all the housework.  
 
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If we want our children to be responsible and loving adults, we need to teach them about responsibility now and be a role model What kind of a person do we want our children to be when they are adults?

When we hope for something to happen in the future, we need to start doing something NOW, with THAT hope in mind.

If we want our children to be generous,
we need to teach our children what generosity means, why it’s important, and we need to practice it ourselves, too.

If we want our children to be responsible and loving adults,
we need to teach them about responsibility now and be a role model.

If we want our children to be honest adults,
then we cannot tolerate their lies and manipulative attempts when they’re little, however cute they may be.

 
If we want our children to be close to their busy Daddy,
then Daddy must make the extra effort to bond and build close relationships with his children since they are little.

If we want our children to enjoy spending time with us, then we must start now.

Set aside time to spend with our children (instead of letting our piles of work drown us and keep us from building relationships with them).

Squat and get down to their eye level when talking with them. Encourage communication. Ask, listen, put away our gadgets during conversations, and don’t easily comment negatively.

That is, if we want them to be adults who enjoy open conversations with us some 10, 15, or 20 years later.

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What are your hopes for the future?

What we do today matters.

I’m so thankful that I was reminded of all the above again last night.

Parents,
let’s reflect on our family, on our children.

Let’s do what needs to be done now, so that our hopes for the future have a better chance of becoming a positive reality.

May God help us all.