Exploring Our Children’s Potentials

When it comes to playtime with Anya, Wilson’s always been the physical one. They’d chase each other across the room. He’d lift her up high and swing her around. They’d roll about on our bed. They’d go silly and jump around.

And I’m kinda the opposite. Though not completely. Anya and I would play playdoh together. Share stories while sitting on the sofa or lying in bed. Tickle each other silly. Cook something up together. Read books. That sort of stuff.

But I think our overall difference in the way we interact with Anya is good, because it makes our ‘play approach’ kinda unique to her. And she gets to enjoy the best of both worlds too *smile*

When it comes to parenting, a few things are for sure though:

> Wilson and I always agree on something in front of Anya. Like, she’ll never get a ‘Yes’ from me, if Wilson already said ‘No’ to her. This way, we want her to know that she can never gain one parent’s favour over another. And that her parents always support each other’s decision.

> When one parent’s disciplining the kid, the other will not interfere, criticise the other parent or ‘defend’ the kid (even if we actually disagree on something, we do it after the whole thing is over, and of course when the kid’s away or something)

> We never argue, fight or do negative stuff to each other (or to other people, of course) in front of the kid

Hmm… somehow our unwritten list of parenting ‘rules and understanding’ is quite long. Some we agreed upon before we even had the kid. Some we discuss and build upon as we go along and learn more about parenting itself.

But anyway these are just some of the stuff I can share right now. Hehe. Perhaps next time I’ll share a few more.

Anya used to have a little ‘house’ in our living room. Hmm, it’s actually a cardbox that I converted into a house. Haha.

Now, that box has been in our living room for nearly ONE MONTH. It’s always about to fall down AND it does makes our living room look smaller.

And so we decided to throw it away today. And of course, not wanting to make Anya confused and sad, I explained why it’s time to say bye bye to her little house.

I then made another ‘house’ for her. This time is better though, because it doesn’t take any extra space in our flat! The set-up is fast and easy. It even has a ‘door’ that opens and closes. AND, most important of all, it makes the little girl VERY happy.

I draped a blanket over Anya’s high chair. Clipped some parts of it with pegs. And voila! She has a ‘house’ again!

Haha. The simplest thing in life is often the best!

Was browsing the babyparenting site of about.com last Christmas, and saw that my blog was actually featured there under their Blog Spotlight. *smile*

How nice. Thanks Steph!

Considering that I’ve lived (and survived) all the way through to day 9 of Anya’s potty training, I think I’ve been quite good, for not quitting, I mean.

Amazingly, over the past 9 days, Anya has improved. A LOT! She can now tell me when she wants to ‘wee-wee’ and sits on her potty. She can even ‘poo’ there too! Woo hoo!

But of course there are still accidents every day, but the rate is now very very low.

She still wears her diapers when she sleeps though and she’s not yet potty trained OUTSIDE of our home. I guess that’s the next big step for me : to take her out WITHOUT her diapers. Sigh. Can’t imagine how those days will be.

Oh well, we’ll just have to take the challenge one step at a time. It’s how we should approach life’s challenges too anyway.

To not be easily put off and discouraged by our own worries of the future.

To go ahead and take that one step though it may look difficult and hard.

To get up and try again when we fall.

Saw this statement in a website:

‘A UCLA study found that at the age of 5 we engage in creative tasks 98 times a day, while at the age of 44 the number shrinks to only 2!’

As we get older we actually get less creative! Or to put it in slightly different words: we do less activities that stimulate and induce our creativity.

We simply, think less creatively.

The thing is, while it’s good to hear how kids unconsciously engage in creative activities sooo many times each day, parents or adults may unconsciously do stuff to them that may actually dampen their creativity.

Like, when adults ‘offer to hold’ the crayons and do the colouring instead, so that the kid’s activity book looks neat, with all the right colours ‘inside the line’.

Or when adults look at the kids’ messy drawings and instead of giving constructive positive comments, they say, ‘Huh? What kind of a drawing is that?!’

Anya started her Sunday School for toddlers today. Her very first time. And I actually was very keen to see how she’d respond to the activities there.

It felt kinda weird (read: happy in a funny kind of feeling) seeing your own kid attend Sunday School. And I had such a big grin on my face when Anya enthusiastically waved her hands during singing time.

After they prayed, listened to Bible stories, etc … it was activities time. Now, this was when I told myself, no I won’t be tempted to do the colouring for her. I’ll explain and show her how to colour the picture properly but she has to do the rest of it herself. I know it’s gonna look messy, but at least she did it herself.

And she did! (well, the teachers helped a little, but Anya did the rest of the ‘scribbling’ herself)

And as expected, the lines went everywhere. But it was Anya’s own work.

Good on you, kid!

PS: Hmm, but I was the one who wrote Anya’s name on it though. Hehe.

Potty training day continues.

And, today she DID it! In her potty! Hwaa! I was SO over the moon!! Yes. Yes. Over some poop!

But I honestly don’t care. It really felt great! Hehe.

I guess, after a series of wiping, talking, wiping, reminding, wiping and more wiping, one successful act can really get your spirit up again! It’s like, ‘Wow … I guess it MAY be possible that she’ll be toilet-trained one day!’

But of course, 20 mins later I heard ‘Mommyyyy! Wee wee…!’ And so I got back down to my knees again and wiped the floor.

I’ve noticed lately Anya sometimes stays dry even after her 2-hour nap. And so I thought, hmm perhaps it’s time to start toilet training her again, since she also shows other signs of readiness.

The thing is, toilet training Anya would mean:
Getting her to sit on her potty frequently. Not letting her wear any diapers for a few hours everyday. Wiping her ‘accidents’ off the floor. And, sometimes I’m not sure if I’m up to it (read: patient, consistent and persistent)

Anyway, I gave it a try this morning. Her yellow potty’s in the living room. And right after she did her ‘big thing’ after breakfast and showered, I let her go diaper-less. And pants-less (basically so that she can quickly sit on her potty without the delay of trying to get her pants off)

And, let’s just say that today, on top of constantly reminding her to sit on her potty, I had to also wipe some ‘mini flood’ off the floor AND the legs of our coffee table 3 times over a period of 3 hours (at least it wasn’t as bad as 2 months ago when it still averaged at 3 accidents per hour!)

Oh well, they never say it’ll be easy.

During our 3-week holiday in Jakarta, we noticed how Anya became very talkative all of the sudden. I mean, she talks 50% more than usual. She’d sing in the car. She’d describe things around her. She just talked and talked.

Then when we returned to Singapore, she kinda went back to her ‘normal self’. A little quieter. But then, apparently that doesn’t last very long! On certain days, she’ll just TALK! A lot! Using 3 to 5 words together at the same time.

‘Mommy! Look! Yellow taxi. Red car. Truck. Blue bus. Big bus. The woman’s wearing a hat. White hat. Look! Flowers on the hat. My hat has no flowers. I’m not wearing a hat. Mommy doesn’t have flowers. Mommy not wearing hat. Look! Look! That man’s sleeping. Papa, look! White car! Green car. Red bus. Big truck!’

And this was only when we’re waiting for taxi.

Oh my. A sudden growth spurt. At 22 months.

I’m happy though, seeing how she can now connect different words and make meanings out of them. It’s a good feeling that my efforts so far – describing, naming and explaining EVERYTHING – finally pays off too.

PS: 80% of the time she uses Indonesian words. I just thought I’ll translate them for everyone’s sake. Hehe.