Exploring Our Children’s Potentials

I shared this news over on my Facebook sometime back, and I thought I should share it here too!

Earlier this month, I was told that I was a ‘Blogger With a Cause’ winner!!

Remember I introduced this social initiative where I encouraged people to share their appreciation, positivity and love towards something through the photos they post online? (I called the project as ‘30 Days of Love, in Pictures‘).

YES, it’s that project!

And, I was awarded a cool new Nikon D5100!!

*Aarrhh SO grateful!! Thank you SO much for those who supported this social initiative! And big thanks to itsmyturn for awarding this to me!*

I have received the camera and here it is!!

Finally, I have my very own DSLR!

*WOOHOO*

…

Okay. Now that I have this camera in my hands, I’d like to do something more.

Something that I haven’t done before. Something that I hope can inspire and be of positive impact to many others.

And this something is:

I’ll be producing online videos, a web TV Channel, where I’ll cover topics related to parenting, families and kids!

There’ll be interviews, as well as clips where I talk about family-related topics, etc.

And yes, I’ll be using this camera!

*So excited!*

(Since I’ll keep on blogging in English, the online videos will mainly be in Bahasa Indonesia, as I really hope to reach out to the many families and parents-to-be here in Indonesia as well)

Oh also, I hope to launch the online video Channel next month together with my blog’s newly revamped layout!!

*Double excitement!*

Yes, definitely LOTS of homework for me to do, but I’m really REALLY excited to do this! To reach out to more with a pro-family message has always been my hope and prayer, and I’m so grateful to be able to start this project!

So. That’s one of my latest updates, everyone!

Hope I can continually have your support!

Thank youuu =)

We have lived in Jakarta for a little over 6 weeks now.

I’ve been enjoying heaps of good things, like the variety of yummy food, nice family get-togethers, and the generally very friendly people (read: Customer service people here are most likely very helpful and polite).

But, I’ve also had my share of moments and personal encounters where I felt things weren’t carried out ‘the way they should’ve been’.

Like, traffic jams caused by badly managed road works (eg. Piles of soil left unattended ‘on the road’ for days), slow bank services, frequently slow internet connection, etc.

Just like any other cities around the world, Jakarta offers good and not-so-good experiences everyday.

Well, naturally.

…

I took the photo above the other day.

Because I was amazed at how I could actually see a mountain view far FAR away!

I mean, I NEVER knew that I could even see a mountain, FROM Jakarta!

(And I wonder how many out of the millions living in this busy city realises it too)

…

What a contrast captured in a single shot, I thought.

In the foreground, we see a view of packed buildings and houses, kinda covered in smoke/pollution. In the background, we see … a beautiful sunset, with a glimpse of a far away mountain.

As I stood and saw it all, I thought to myself, how we see something really depends on our own perspective, doesn’t it?

We can focus on the polluted city view in the foreground. Or, we can enjoy the beautiful orange sky in the background.

And really, it’s not about ‘ignoring’ the existence of the foreground. It’s more about ‘looking beyond’ the foreground, and focusing on the ‘better’ view.

…

I then think to myself, how we see life, Jakarta and how we live our day to day here is similar in many ways.

We can choose to enjoy the good aspects of the city, and ‘close one eye’ on the bad stuff we encounter everyday.

It doesn’t mean we can therefore ‘ignore’ (read: be immuned from) the not-so-good experiences.

But, it’s more about looking beyond, and not putting too much energy in feeling unhappy about the bad stuff?

Ah anyway.

Personally I’d like to learn to appreciate our days here in Jakarta and not dwell too much on the ‘hiccups’.

I prefer to learn the art of looking at my glass as ‘Half Full’.

…

Hope your days are ‘half full’ too, everyone! =)

I think parents of more than 1 child would agree when I say that however much two siblings love each other, there are moments when they bicker, irritate, disagree and get on each other’s nerves.

Yes, they may play nicely with each other, but there are times too when negative words about each other are uttered. Times when they dislike each other’s presence and behaviour.

To me, although they are still little, they are just like me, a sinner, and so it’s not a surprise if they have a strong tendency to occasionally be negative than to be positive, to dislike than to like, to be rude than to say kind words.

To do what they most likely already know as wrong than to do what’s right.

To me, it’s part and parcel of growing up, understanding their sinful selves and learning to change for the better, with God’s help, everyday.

Anyway.

In my daily effort to help nurture positive relationships between the two siblings (who have a 2.5 year age gap), I implement a few approaches since they’re little.

Here are some of the principles I always emphasise to them:

1. I always tell them both something along this line,

“God gives you a brother so you can learn to share and to care. To give and receive and to be cared by another family member other than Mommy and Daddy.”

“God gives you a brother who may not always agree with you, who may annoy you, so that you can learn to be patient, to control your emotions and the words you say, even though you’re not happy about something. It’s a constant training that God gives to you, just like how God wants me to learn and be a more patient Mom as I deal with you and your misbehaviour too.’

“God gives you a sister and a brother so that you can learn to love and care. If we can’t love and care for our own family, how can we love and care for others out there?”

…

2. We always remind them to NOT say bad comments or use discouraging words when talking to and about each other.

Comments like: “Oh, you’re so useless!” or “Stupid boy!”, for example, will never go ‘unnoticed’ in our eyes as their parents.

They both know this ‘rule’ and they know they need to apologise to each other if they happen to not be in control of their words.

…

3. When they argue and are not nice towards each other (and continue to behave like that towards each other after I’ve asked them to stop), I’d ask them to go to a room to sort things out amongst themselves, to settle their differences/conflict on their own. They can only come out if they’ve come to an agreement.

And here are the possible scenarios:

– They both settle their differences soon after I’ve asked if they need to go to a room to settle the conflict elsewhere on their own (ie. They don’t end up going to a room)

– They do (often unwillingly) go to a room, and in a few minutes (usually less than 5 mins), they’ll both say “We’ve agreed, Mommy”. They’d then come out and while they stand in front of me, I’ll ask them what it is that they’ve agreed on.

They’ll then need to do 2 things :
– Apologise to each other
– Give each other a hug

I implement this ‘apologise and hug’ approach since they’re little, as I’d like them to always be in good terms again soon after they’ve badly argued and treated each other unnicely.

Note:
– If they apologise / hug each other insincerely (eg. Bumping each other’s body or hugging each other quickly with an unhappy face), I’d ask them to repeat and hug again until they do mean it, and can smile to each other. And in the end, they’d usually giggle and smile, realising how they’ve been acting silly to each other to begin with =)

– No, I don’t separate them into 2 different rooms because when they’re in conflict, they’ll be happy to be alone and not deal with each other. For siblings who prefer to play and be each other but are in conflict / big arguments with each other, putting them in separate rooms will work better, I guess.

…

So, having done all of the above (and a few more other approaches), does it mean Anya and Vai are always loving towards each other?

Errr … no, of course not =) Because after all, they ARE siblings, and they ARE sinners.

But yes, I know they are constantly learning.

I think siblings (whose age gaps are relatively close to each other) naturally have this kind of relationship. They love, but they also annoy each other at times. They argue, but they also hug each other silly.

And I strongly feel as parents, we do play a strong role in encouraging / nurturing positive relationships between siblings in the family.

What we say and how we respond to situations at home affect how they treat / view / love / respect each other.

May God give us all the needed patience, consistency and wisdom in raising siblings in our family.

Have a great week ahead, everyone!

…

PS: Any other practical tips to share when it comes to encouraging love and positive relationship between siblings? Do share yeah =)

We’ve always had ‘arts and crafts’ session at home back in Singapore.

We made stuff. We drew and scribble. We used our recyclables to make things =)

We kinda stopped having such sessions when I got busy with our mad ‘relocation busy-ness’ though. I just couldn’t manage to find the time.

By now, we’ve been here in Jakarta for 5 weeks, and I’m just glad that the kids and I managed to start spending some ‘arts and crafts’ time *again* today!

And I must say, it was nice seeing them both drawing, choosing which crayon colours to use, and focusing their attention on what they’re creating.

To me, it’s definitely way much better than seeing them sitting quietly watching TV!

…

Note:

In today’s drawing activity, here’s what we did:
– I encouraged the kids to draw something in the middle of the drawing paper
– We then drew wavy lines ‘outwards’ and used a marker to darken all lines
– The kids used vibrant crayon colours and filled everything with colour
– They then outlined all lines with black crayons.

I love the vibrant colours. And as they coloured their drawings, they did feel the same way too.

You see, sometimes the kids feel ‘too lazy’ to colour their sketches. ‘It takes too long to colour everything’ is the usual excuse.

I’m okay with them not colouring their drawings, BUT if they ‘always’ avoid colouring their drawings because they’re ‘lazy’, then I feel that’s just not right.

And so as they saw how nice their colourful drawings gradually turned out, I casually shared with them how God splashed so much wonderful colours in His creations. Under the sea, on land, beautiful sunset, everything. Imagine a black&white underwater world, I said … Errr, that’ll be boring and dull, they said.

I think they got the message =)

It’s been just a little over a month since we moved to Jakarta, and guess what?

We *finally* received the whole ‘welcome gift’ set : bacterial and viral infection =)

And it hits everyone.

We’re either taking antibiotics, vitamins, Sambucol, Antangin (Indonesian medicine =), Panadol, Paracetamol, Chlormine, … you name it.

And yep, Brie needs to be nebulised again (Thankfully we have the machine at home so we can nebulise her every 8 hours to help her deal with her phlegmy and chesty cough)

[No, none of us are having diarrhea though]

I shared our family’s current ‘status’ on Facebook, and other than the well-wishes which I really appreciate, I’m grateful too that some of the comments left reminded me how :

– This is just a phase where our bodies are adapting to the new environment (ie. The air and a lot of other things are generally not as clean as how things are in Singapore)

– This is a way for our bodies to get ‘stronger’, ie. We may be sick now, but afterwards, generally our bodies end up stronger because of better immune system.

Yes, I hope our bodies become stronger when it comes to fighting bacteria, germs and virus day by day here =)

…

PS: Some shared to me how they also felt sick within a month or so after moving to Jakarta for good. If you’re in similar situations, do share yeah …

I think I love my stay at Gili Trawangan the best when we went to visit Lombok recently.

It’s an island, a little off from Lombok.

I love how everyone there on the island either walk on foot, hop on a Cidomo (horse cart) or rent a bike. NO cars or motorbikes!

I love the beach, the clear waters, the overall surrounding.

So grateful that we had such a wonderful weather during our one night stay there! (was told that it was cloudy and rainy days before we were there. Phew!)

Anyway.

Here’s more about our visit to Gili Trawangan.

There are three islands near Lombok, they are : Gili Trawangan, Gili Meno and Gili Air.

The biggest one is Gili Trawangan and it’s the most commonly visited one too, I was told.

We heard about how we could go snorkeling at Gili Trawangan, and so we decided to stay overnight at a Beach House (instead of going there in the morning and coming back to Lombok island on the same day)

…

From our hotel (Senggigi Beach Hotel), we rented a car to take us to Bangsal Harbour. We reached there at around 11.30am.

We chartered a boat (one way trip) from the ticketing counter at the harbour, and we paid Rp185,000 (worked out to be about S$25, for all seven of us, ie. Five of us plus Wilson’s parents who joined us on this trip)

TIPS:

– We had to step into the waters when boarding the boat because the water was too shallow for the boat to really land on the shore. So, I recommend : wear shorts and slippers / sandals.

– If you’re going to engage local porters to help carry your bags to the boat, you’re looking at about paying them Rp3000 per bag. I recommend engaging just one or two local porters. Be aware that many may offer their services, and you’d need to (firmly, but with a smile =) say no to them.

By now I can’t quite remember how long it took us to get to Gili Trawangan (now you can see why I blog. My memory is getting so rusty, I have to pen down all this to remember my precious moments spent with my family!)

I think the boat ride lasted for about 30 mins or so.

Anyway, check out the view at Gili Trawangan!

I love, love, LOVE it.

Upon reaching Gili Trawangan, we took 2 horse carts (called ‘Cidomo’). One was for our family of five, the other was for Wilson’s parents and our bags.

The trip from where we got off the boat to our Beach House was actually a short one. You could actually walk there from the harbour. We didn’t know.

The Cidomo man charged us Rp50,000 per cidomo. That’s about S$6.90. Frankly, it’s quite expensive considering the short distance. Oh well, we ‘paid’ for the unique experience, I guess =)

As you can see, the above is how the main street looks like on this island!

People just casually walk here and there (many are barefooted, and in their beachwear), or on bikes.

Shops on your left and right sell sarongs, sun blocks, etc. They have snorkelling equipments for rent, shops offering diving lessons / trips, boat rides to Bali, etc. Quite a lot of eating places too (mostly western food).

Our Beach House has two small pools. The kids had a great time there, jumping off the side of the pool, … COUNTLESS times! =)

Eating places on this island are most likely along the beach, so I’d say nearly (if not ALL) restaurants on this island have a SPECTACULAR view of the ocean and mountains.

If the weather happens to be great when you’re on the island, … ah, expect refreshingly breathtaking view!

…

We went snorkeling with the kids when we’re on this island (Brie napped and stayed at the beach house with my Mom-in-law =).

And THAT was a great experience too. The first time we all ever snorkeled.

Will share photos and how it went in another post! =)

…

Okay now, here are more tips to share:

– Fresh water is not as readily available on this island. At our Beach House, we showered in ‘salty’ water and rinsed ourselves with fresh water afterwards.

– We waited for a very long time to get a Cidomo to take us back to where we could board a boat to take us back to Lombok island. And we could NOT find any available ones. So we walked to the ‘harbour’ and it was manageable, I mean … we pulled our luggages and the distance from the Beach House to the harbour wasn’t too bad.

– Instead of chartering a boat, we decided to take a Public Boat back to Lombok. It only cost us Rp10,000 per person (about S$1.40 / person). Bought the tickets from the one and only ticketing office there and waited for about 10 minutes to board the boat (basically, they always need to wait till the boat has ‘enough people’ before it leaves the shore)

– Again, I recommend wearing shorts and sandals because you’d need to get into the waters to board the boat.

– And oh, put on lots of sunscreen lotion! The weather does get pretty warm and hot there.

But then again, hey … you ARE after all on a tropical island! =)

…

We definitely look forward to the day we can visit Gili Trawangan again!

I have quite a few people asking me how it’s been for us, living in Jakarta and all. Especially since I personally have not lived in this busy city for more than 20 years.

Well, it’s been close to a month since we all left Singapore, and actually, … it’s been okay.

Both Anya and Vai are adapting pretty well with their new environment. Brie who was clingy after we moved to our own place is now more or less okay too.

And me? Well, I think I’m settling down relatively well too =)

Plus, we’re all healthy since we arrived, and I say, that’s purely God’s grace.

[We eat *yummy* street hawker food too, and so far it’s been okay for us. Errr, just don’t look at how the food is prepared, they say, hehe]
…

Someone told me recently that the first three months are considered ‘honeymood period’. Reality will start to bite after that.

Some others told me to be prepared if I experience emotional downs in the first 6 months.

It’s part and parcel of getting myself ‘adapted’ to living in a new country, they say.

(Yes, better be prepared mentally, I say. And I’m thankful for such well-meaning advices)

…

If you ask me, I think every country has its pros and cons. Good stuff and not-so-good stuff.

People can focus on the bad. And, they can also focus more on the good.

I personally prefer to go with the latter.

I choose to focus more on the good and interesting aspects of our ‘new life’ here in Jakarta.

I’m learning, discovering and experiencing new things everyday.

And, I have started sharing them pictorially too! =)

I’ve posted photos with the hashtag ‘Appreciating Jakarta’ on my Facebook, Twitter and Instagram.

Photos such as these:

[Anya and Daddy having fun up in the air!]

[‘Sewing on the go’, literally!]

[Love the beautiful sunset!]

…

I’ll continue to share with you what I learn and observe as well as how life is for our little family, here in Jakarta.

And you’re most welcome to add me on Facebook, follow me on Twitter and Instagram (under ‘leonny_oureverydaythings), if you haven’t yeah =)

Have a wonderful week, everyone!