Parenting : When Parents Spend ‘Too Much’ On Their Children’s Birthdays
I came across this interesting article today. A thought-provoking one for me.
And I’d like to share it with you.
It’s titled ‘When Spoiling the Kids Goes Too Far‘, by Anita Othman, on the Jakarta Globe.
Click HERE to read the article.
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The article highlights what some parents do for their children on their birthdays.
One father bought his 14yo son a Ferrari.
Another father made it a tradition to award his children a car of their choice on their 15th birthday (complete with a driver and a customised license plate)
A mother gave her 15yo daughter an ultra-luxury handbag.
Or, a weekend getaway in Paris with friends, in a private jet.
And the latest, a father bought his teenage son a … helicopter.
A REAL one.
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While of course it is totally up to the parents themselves on what they’d like to give to their own children on their birthdays (since they can afford it anyway!), this article made me wonder :
… can they possibly get this message instead, ‘Mommy and Daddy are usually busy and away from you, we hope these gifts can replace what we haven’t done together and the family time lost over the years.
If WE had the financial resources, and we spent it lavishly on the children, will they learn the value of money or hard work?
Do these gifts make us bond better with our children?
Or, can they possibly get this message instead, ‘Mommy and Daddy are usually busy and away from you, we hope these gifts can replace what we haven’t done together and the family time lost over the years.’
Also, I thought 14 and 15 year olds are NOT supposed to be driving anything just yet?
Here’s an extract from the article:
“Perhaps some parents are also guilty of trying to outdo each other? I can just imagine parents thinking to themselves, “If so-and-so held such a grand birthday party and gave such an expensive present, I have to top that or my child might think I love him or her less. Or even worse, people might think I can’t afford to splurge.”
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What a scary, materialistic world we live in.
A world filled with many materially-happy children and teens, but time-deprived and disconnected relationships?
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We may not buy our teenage children cars or helicopters.
But have we splurged ‘unnecessarily’?
If we are not constantly careful about how we are parenting our children and the kinds of values we pass on to them, I worry we too will follow wherever the ‘currents’ take us.
Food for thought for me.
And for you too, I hope.
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Here are three related articles I wrote in the past that I’d like to share with you today:
> What kind of life our kids are living in?
> Children, their ‘comfortable’ living and their fighting spirit
> Are we suppressing our kid’s fighting spirit?
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Wah usia belasan dikasi mobil mewah? Aku dulu dikasi apaan ya? hehe
Jadi inget fenomen banyaknya anak usia SD di Indonesia mengendarai sepeda motor hiks.
Emang ortu sellau ingin yg terbaik buat anaknya, tapi alangkah baiknya kalau dikondisikan dgn tingkat kedewasaan dan tanggung jwb anaknya.
TFS ya Mbak, kudu bener2 bijak nih jd ortu, gmn caranya nyenengin anak tanpa manjain 🙂
Betul sekali, mba … mengerikan ya kalau melihat betapa mudahnya anak diberikan fasilitas yang ‘belum utk umur dan tingkat kedewasaannya’. Sebenarnya semua ini sangat menjerumuskan / mencelakakan si anak … =\
Erm, when people is rich up to that level, that can afford a ferrari or helicopter, well, their thought is different from us. So, most of them judge mostly from the outside, material, outlook first, rather than spiritual. This is how they think.
AhJian recently posted..20/10/2012快乐周末公园行
So true! We have to be careful how we use money – children tend to adopt our attitudes… we need to set the example and help our kids understand that material possession isn’t everything in life…
Sandra recently posted..Precious One Giveaway for Wesley…
Hi Sandra,
Yes, … when it comes to money, things can get rather complicated, … also because we all (including children) are naturally more inclined to be ‘materialistic’ than not …
Awesome article, thank you for sharing, parents should always aware this things..
Thanks for the sweet note, Willyn …
Thanks for sharing, it is a good reminder for parents 🙂
Virginia recently posted..Fund raising for charity event at Church
Thank you Virginia …
Thanks for stopping by too!
Thanks for the sharing =) Am planning for Ella’s first birthday party. Such a timely reminder for me =D
@Sofi ….. Dun spoil Ella pls. No Ferrary or Helicopter for u Ella.
@sofi : you’re welcome … =) can’t wait to see Ella’s bday pics nih! 🙂
@heru : hehe … no helicopter for Revive jg dong ya ? =)