Exploring Our Children’s Potentials

Dear parents,

I have this heavy burden in my heart, and I feel I should write about it and share it with you.

It’s about OUR children, and the kinds of games created and made available to them, today.

Have you heard of games like ‘GTA’ (short for ‘Grand Theft Auto’) more and more boys play these days?

It’s a game where players get to fantasise about being a ‘top notch criminal’ – stealing cars, killing the cops, running down pedestrians, etc.

games out there meant for young girls, where they get to fantasise about having boyfriends, flirting, dressing up and going out for datesOr, have you heard about the oh-so-many games out there meant for young girls, where they get to fantasise about having boyfriends, flirting, dressing up and going out for dates, kissing and doing ‘more activities’ with their so-called virtual boyfriends?

Are we aware of the kinds of games OUR children play?

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Also, do our children have ‘free access’ to everything online? (Through their smartphones, computers, or tablets)

Do our children ‘freely’ download games online?

Sigh.

Unfortunately, this is the reality: we live in the day and age where we often are not aware of the danger of the ‘online world’. Often, because it’s simply not ‘physical’.

I mean, many parents would NOT let their children walk all alone in a deserted park at night for fear of rapists, criminals, robbers and all sorts of weird people harming their children.

More and more children are increasingly ‘de-sensitised’ towards violence, crime, negative / dangerous behavoursBut these very same parents might ALLOW their children enter the online world freely, without any supervision or care. In the comfort of the children’s home or bedroom, these children may – highly possibly – be exposed to obscenity, vulgarity, violence, pedophiles, criminals (acting as harmless young children themselves), etc.

This. Is. Such. A. Scary. Reality.

More and more children are increasingly exposed and  ‘de-sensitised’ towards violence, crime, negative / dangerous behavours, to name a few.

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So what am I trying to urge and encourage my fellow parents to do?

1) Let’s start building a stronger bond and trust, between ourselves and our children.

This is so so sooo crucial, much more crucial than the time when ‘WE’ grew up.

Why?

Because at the time when WE grew up, electronic media was not as widely available to children as it is today. And, the online world at the time has not become as varied (read : ‘negative for children in more ways’) as today too.

Our children MUST be able to trust that we indeed love themOur children MUST be able to trust that we indeed love them, and openly communicate and share with us about ‘their world’. And if our communication and relationship with our children is good, when we ask them to NOT play a particular game (or two or three), they’d *hopefully* listen because they trust it is for their best interest.

Now.

It gets tougher when our children enter their teenage years, yes?

Well, all parents know how this IS a possible reality (May God help us!).

But I genuinely believe a loving and open communication with teenagers IS still possible, IF the parents have spent time and effort – sacrifices, tears and prayers –  in building a loving and strong relationship with their children, since they’re very young.

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2) We should never be ‘naive’ and unaware of what’s going on in our children’s world, online and offline.

Of course it doesn’t mean that we must ‘know all game developments’, nor become ‘intrusive’ parents, who ‘probe’ into our children’s lives like uncaring detectives.

it doesn’t mean that we become ‘intrusive’ parents, who ‘probe’ into our children’s lives like uncaring detectivesI guess, one thing that we can surely try to do is develop a routine, a habit, based on trust and love, where the children are encouraged to always openly share their days, their friends, the happenings, everyday (And as they grow older, we too share with them our daily lives and struggles, etc)

And, before each download or purchase of games, we parents need to find out more about the games too.

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3) Share with the children the potential danger of some online and offline games.

I strongly believe parents today need to educate and equip their children to ‘discern’ what’s right and what’s wrong, what’s healthy and what’s not.

eventually, they do need to discern and make the ‘right’ choices in their livesBecause, we can never be with them all the time.

As they grow up, they’ll be exposed to all sorts of temptations, challenges, tough choices.

And eventually, they do need to discern and make the ‘right’ choices in their lives.

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4) Control the amount of ‘game time’ (exposure) our children get

How much game time is allowed by you?

Hours each day?

Do our children have their own smartphones / computers in their rooms / laptops with free internet access? *simply too dangerous, btw*

Games are undeniably addictive.Games are undeniably addictive.

And the impact will be worse with children if game time is not monitored (eg. Allocation of study/reading time is less, shorter concentration level at school, negative impact on their eyesights, etc).

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Sigh. Growing up is so much harder these days.

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And gee, this is such a looooong post!

(And I haven’t even written everything that I wish I could write about!)

But.

My main thoughts are poured out here.

And I hope and pray that this post is read by as many parents as possible.

Please do share it, if you feel this is a topic that other parents need to pay more attention to as well.

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Growing up is so much harder these days.Parents,

We all know it.

Parenting is SO not easy.

Which is why I pray hard for my children.

(for their faith, their safety, their well-being, and their everything, and for myself, my daily sanity, strength from above, and for everything else too!)

Besides, I too need God’s help and wisdom everyday.

For I am too far from perfect or capable to be a parent.

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May God have mercy on our children and every one of us.